Hey Folks!

Haven´t been posting much actually, cause being able to type with one hand isn´t a lot of fun.

It`s my own fault however, one should be more careful with newly purchased kitchen knives. Though the doctor did the sutures quite nicely actually.

Sutures will be removed on Wednesday, am confident that I will be somewhat better equipped to at least partially use the right hand at that point.

Aaaaaarrrrgggggghh!

The Difference between Ladies and Real Women

Subject: Ladies vs. Women

Ladies: If you accidentally over-salt a dish while it’s still cooking, drop in a peeled potato and it will absorb the excess salt for an instant “fix-me-up.”

Real Woman: If you over-salt a dish while you are cooking, that’s too damn bad. Please recite with me, The Real Women’s motto: “I made it and you will eat it and I don’t care how bad it tastes.”

Ladies: Cure for headaches: Take a lime, cut it in half and rub it on your forehead. The throbbing will go away.

Real Woman: Take a lime, mix it with tequila, chill and drink. You might still have the headache, but who cares?

Ladies: Stuff a miniature marshmallow in the bottom of a sugar cone to prevent ice cream drips.

Real Woman: Just suck the ice cream out of the bottom of the cone, for Pete’s sake. You are probably lying on the couch, with your feet up eating it anyway.

Ladies: To keep potatoes from budding, place an apple in the bag with the potatoes.

Real Woman: Buy boxed mashed potato mix and keep it in the pantry for up to a year.

Ladies: When a cake recipe calls for flouring the baking pan, use a bit of the dry cake mix instead and there won’t be any white mess on the outside of the cake.

Real Woman: Go to the bakery — they’ll even decorate it for you.
Ladies: Brush some beaten egg white over pie crust before baking to yield a beautiful glossy finish.

Real Woman: Sara Lee frozen pie directions do not include brushing egg whites over the crust, so I just don’t do it.

Ladies: If you have a problem opening jars, try using latex dishwashing gloves. They give a non slip grip that makes opening jars easy.

Real Woman: Go ask the very cute neighbor guy to do it.

And finally the most important tip…

Ladies: Don’t throw out all that leftover wine. Freeze into ice cubes for future use in casseroles and sauces.

Real Woman: Leftover wine??

A Poke With a Stick

I think Jen is trying to cheer up in light of her upcoming birthday, cause she sent me this:

The Perks of Being Over 40

– Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

– In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

– No one expects you to run into a burning building.

– People call at 9PM and ask, “Did I wake you?”.

– People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

– There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

– Things you buy now won’t wear out.

– You can eat dinner at 4PM.

– You can live without sex but not without glasses.

– You enjoy hearing about other peoples’ operations.

– You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

– You have a party and the neighbors don’t even realize it.

– You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

– You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

– You sing along with elevator music.

– Your eyes won’t get much worse.

– Your health plan is beginning to pay off.

– Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

– Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them either.

– Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

Lolololol, grin.

Projects

I know, I know. I just haven’t been posting at all lately. However, the pictures below will give you a clue as to what I have been doing all week. My father and I expanded the loft in the house. We thought this was going to be a 1-2 day project. Yo.

We spent all of the first day just mounting and unmounting and remounting etc. etc. the support beams. By the time the floorboards were layed on the next day, I realized I was going to have to do some heavy duty sanding on the old floor, otherwise, I’d have half the room with a dark floor and half the room with a light floor.

So, all of Wednesday, I sanded, and sanded.

When it was finally finished, I decided to put some furniture upstairs that had been downstairs and vice versa. Chaos. Absolute chaos.

Now, most of the dust has been wiped away, below some of the pictures (and check out the finished loft at the bottom). Big hug and thanks to Paps for his untiring efforts 🙂

Ladder, up, ladder down…..

Chaos on both floors……

That dusty old dust……

(even visible on the camera lens on this picture)

These two were confused as heck about what was going on…….

Ain’t it a beauty!

The Summer of the Century

(somehow it seems).

We have had temperatures between 75-80° F since the beginning of May, sometimes even hotter, with very little rain.

There are huge cracks in the ground in the lawn. However, my roses and melons are loving this. I am too.

The next three weeks are mine – these are the three weeks I look forward to the entire year – three weeks with no obligations, no musts, just my jeans-cut-offs and my garden, three weeks barefoot and outside.

The vet said our dog is too fat. We’ve been giving him diet food rations for four months now and he just isn’t losing an ounce. Thinking this might be due to the fact that he lies around and sleeps all day (especially in the summer heat), I got my inliners out of the closet yesterday and put him through some fitness training. Ta da – even without breaking any of my bones, ain’t that amazing?

I have got to practice using those strange brakes, I think I loosened up at least four traffic signs trying to slow my pace on the way home………

The Jersey

The story belonging to the jersey, in Jen’s own words:

“The Tennessee Titans Jersey that Sebastian is wearing in that picture is a legitimate football jersey wore by whoever the football player is – his Big Brother Rick some how or other got the jersey and took a picture of Sebastian wearing it – I thought it was great the way it devoured him! Matter of fact it was taken the very same day that Sebastian appeared [NOT for the first time either] on the Talk of the Town [local newsy kind of talk show] Sebastian and Rick were talking about the merits of what it means to have a Big Brother/Little Brother – it is however the very first time that I have actually SEEN him on the show – everyone else in the world sees my kid but ME – I have heard about it over the course of over 2 years when he and Rick have made various appearances on the news promoting Big Brother/Big Sister and I either never knew about the airing of the show OR flat out missed the thing – so it was exciting for me to FINALLY see this airing – even some stranger also remembered seeing him on the show – just as long as he stays level headed about this minor celebrity thing and takes it all in stride than it’s ALL good!”