This was by far the crappiest week I have had in about three years.
Yesterday was a wonderful sunny day and I was in a wonderful mood.
Followed by a flip-out shouting attack by my boss at work, followed by coming home to find the cat had puked on the freshly washed rug, followed by kind of a nervous breakdown, stupid old me crying and blubbering.
Have decided to regroup my priorities. Everything that is of true importance to me is not work related. I need to hammer that into my thick skull.
And hammer, and hammer.
Jennifer has announced she is sending me (well it sounds like about a ton) of yarn to work into some sort of afghan, so therapy is on its way.. 😉
Anyhow, Jenny sent me these 15 things to do at Walmart, and I might just head on up there tomorrow to get rid of some of this built up anger:
1. Get 24 boxes of condoms & randomly put them in peoples carts when they aren’t looking.
2. Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5 minute intervals.
3. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms.
4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, ‘Code 3’ in housewares….and see what happens.
5. Go to the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M&M’s on layaway.
6. Move a ‘CAUTION – WET FLOOR’ sign to a carpeted area.
7. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you’ll invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask “Why can’t you people just leave me alone?”
9. Look right into the security camera, use it as a mirror and pick your nose.
10. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are.
11. Dart around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the theme from “Mission Impossible.”
12. In the auto department, practice your “Madonna look” using different size funnels.
13. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say “PICK ME! PICK ME!”
14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream “NO! NO! It’s those
And last but not least:
15. Go into a fitting room, shut the door and wait a while and then yell loudly “There’s no toilet paper in here.”